SPEAKER_02 0:12

To be single, to be cool, let the world know it's you, to be cute, to be love, let below.

SPEAKER_03 0:21

Right subs above Gonna stay funky, gonna stay chic, gonna stay chicken, yeah. And be everything that you know you can be, yeah. Gonna stay funky, gonna stay shit. Uh be everything that you know you can be.

SPEAKER_00 0:46

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Go ahead with all that. Be everything you need to be. What's up, family folks? We're back here, and I'm so glad to have my brother Jafar. What's up, bro? What's up, brother? Always glad to have you with me. You can be here anytime. It doesn't matter. You make this shit run.

SPEAKER_01 1:01

Always a pleasure.

SPEAKER_00 1:02

I'm glad to talk to you again today because I am recapping some information from a previous show I did with Charles, and we were talking about why men are afraid to ask for help.

SPEAKER_01 1:11

Love Charles.

SPEAKER_00 1:12

And uh, we just kind of teeter totted on the surface of the challenges that have it happened physically and mentally uh for men who choose not to engage in help and talk to anybody, whether it's other brothers, family members, or whomever.

SPEAKER_01 1:26

Oh, you're going right in.

SPEAKER_00 1:27

And um, it started growing because we started sharing a little more information during that week and then some content online I saw in the Breakfast Club talking about um brotherhood and connections and more importantly, tribes. So I started digging a little more into the topic, and I wanted to talk again with you about it, just to expand it, elevate it in some cases, and uh drive it home because I feel like there's a global consciousness, uh, a concern, an energy in the uh earth about this, about men's health, their mental and physical health, and how to get down. Listen, some some startling statistics that I want to share with you. Men tend to not engage in help-seeking behavior and downplay their physical and mental health symptoms. Uh, cardiovascular disease is the leading global cause of death, accounting for 17.3 million deaths a year, and the number is expected to grow more than 23.6 million by 2030. Heart disease is the number one killer of men. Men associate seeking assistance for a psychological or emotional problem with shame or weakness. Admitting a problem and seeking help is perceived as being weak, and what is seen as strong is being tough, macho, manly, which is avoiding problems, ignoring pain, and denying reality. And waiter men get this idea that asking for help is tantamount to weakness, other men. Men are the worst offenders when it comes to judging and shaming men. They shoot their own and kick a man when he's down. Brothers, we need us. We need one another to be strong, to hold us accountable, to provoke us, to help us grow and expand and evolve for ourselves as individuals, for our families, for our communities, and for the world.

SPEAKER_01 3:34

Well, I think, I mean, as much as it's so easy to say like a tribe and uh community or or whatever, a lot of people, we've been so far removed from that. I mean, we're not even talking about COVID and how that shifted a lot of us. I mean, just societal. I mean, things are not like it was back in the 70s, where I remember a neighbor could literally knock on the door to use the bathroom and use the phone. And we were cool. You know what I'm saying? It was like we understood community and we took care of each other. And now I think a lot of us have been so far removed from that. Social media, things that we see on TV, it's not just, you know, the women being fed, you know, unrealistic things. There are things that are also, I think, that um are results of various thought processes that tend to take over. And we judge ourselves by that and not realizing that we're shutting everybody else out. You know what I'm saying? It's very important. And it's also, I think the number one thing is just to realize how much it actually is out there and opening up ourselves again, because it's not something that's forward to the human condition, but it does. It takes a lot, it takes a lot to even get beyond your own judgments and things like that, you know, beyond the mirror talk. What do you do when you come out of that mirror? You know, how do you allow that to reflect? How are you upping your level of allowance? These things truly can be life-changing, but it's it's very important. Um, why not? I think it's just us. And it's something that I love that people are getting beyond because we're mixing that human connection. You know what I'm saying? I think a lot of things are becoming so automated that it's like we realize that we we can't do that with our emotions. It's just not possible almost. You know what I'm saying? And and then, you know, when we're looking at the as above, so below, as within, so we're out. We're really understanding more and more that our inward is what's being reflected out. You know what I'm saying? The more that we're blocking, the more you're really blocking your blessings, the more that you are even hating yourself for feeling like you're not even good enough, the more that your outer world is actually going to reflect that. So I'm I love that you brought up, you came out swinging with the um, you know, the things, the health conditions, the things that happen, even just holding on to stuff, that stuff can wreck you. It's energy. You're literally moving from an ease to a dis-ease. We've heard this many times, so many clips, it's become popular, but it's absolutely true. And that's why, let's say, someone who's constantly dogging themselves or constantly checking in heart issues, constantly feeling like they're never enough, or they can never receive enough love, or they've been struggling with relationships, that stuff will tear you up after a while. Believe it or not, how it manifests in the lower, the lesser expression is you might end up with heart problems. Those that are dealing with um certain aspects of even mental situations, not all things, I'm not an expert at this, but I do know this. Not all things are absolutely hereditary as far as the end result. The thing that happens that y'all keep going through this, I noticed this by even looking at, you know, my father, his father, things like that, the way that we may process information may make us more prone to be stressed or depressed or more motivated or more, you know, that type of thing. So I think when we take into account all of these things, that's the reason why self-maintenance, self-love, all of these things are important because that's also what you're bringing to the round table. That's what you're bringing to this circle, that's what you're bringing to, you know, all of that. And you want to get that back, you know? And it's easy because society teaches even a love, love is vulnerable. Love is actually the most powerful thing, it's the most powerful weapon, as well as, you know what I'm saying? You love hard enough, you will break down the back office of your enemy's mind. That's why some of the ancients are taught to love your enemies. But anyway, anyway, moving on, moving on. There's there's a flip side to that, of course, and we know this well too. You've got to, just like we talked about, you gotta, you know, admit where you're really hurting. To be actually healed from it, to be delivered from something, you gotta surrender it. A lot of times, I mean, because of what we're taught, because we're so used to putting on facades, putting up posts, putting up trips we could barely pay for, stressed out about, but we will definitely smile in every photo. You know what I'm saying? We're used to doing that. It's hard to even come to the collective, to come to the group and literally say, My niggas, I'm dying. You know what I'm saying? I'm I'm really that that's hard for a lot of people to do, and that's why the more we'll go, the worse it gets, the more we'll have to deal with. Like you're saying, these these the health issues, how they play out. People don't understand. By the time it's hit that point, there's been so much at work that is worse than this thing. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 8:27

Listen, unaddressed medical conditions will worsen over time if not treated. Mental illness, relational problems, addictions, and traumas also tend to worsen over time if not addressed. Certainly, men don't want to just be in this precarious position, so why the struggle to ask for help? We're killing ourselves. Men run the risk of some very serious negative health outcomes regarding cardiovascular and immune system health. Furthermore, chronic stress and unhealthy lifestyles are among the leading causes of morbidity and death. All the stress, depression, anxiety, poor eating, and drinking go straight to our hearts, literally.

SPEAKER_01 9:11

Come on now. Everything that we're fed, I mean, from early childhood to the different types of programming and the egregores we align with, I mean, these things are things that introduce to us, whether you're male or female. You're either taught, you know, to be the princess, but you're never taught how to be the queen of the castle. You're taught that you gotta be this or you're nothing. Uh it doesn't matter if you can actually be fulfilled as that teacher and be fine because that's what you really wanted to do with your life. There's so many things at play that we actually take our own like qualifications and stuff and put in the trash because of the things that we've been fed. I think there's too many things to name. Um, because with the individual, it is different. There's a different, you know, way that they're handling it, managing it, uh, all of those different things. Um, but I think it's it's fairly important to know across the aisle, across the ways, across the oceans, um, there's still things that are so backwards. Some would say on purpose, I'm not even gonna go there or get involved in these different theories. But I mean, honestly, the word love, again, it's taught like it's vulnerable in certain situations as it becomes, you know, becoming a man. And when you say I need, that's admitting what you're lacking. And again, if you're not willing to look in the mirror, you don't know who you are. Anybody could tell you anything about you, whether it's true or false. Anybody could take and diminish everything you've done, and you'll sit there and listen to them. But that's why it is so important to search self and to know self and be open enough to understand the, you know, we're taught the alpha male, here it is, is the most powerful dude in the room. Because he'll get on the soapbox and he'll sit there and scream so everybody can hear him, making sure you get it and he's got something to say. But then again, we discount the role of the Omega male who considers everybody in their space, as everybody's an extension of his experience. That's the guy that influences everybody for real. That's the guy that actually might say, hey guys, write down. Listen to him. He might have something to say. And everybody listen. That's the guy. And so we're not taught that. The power in that is accepting everybody in their spaces, including ourselves. So there's power and there's strength in that. And I think that we're just taken away from that with everything that we're thinking. It's it's it could be considered a mental epidemic or whatever, but it's something that the remedy is still also there within us. And openness to that, finding out and not waiting until we are literally, even as a society, knocked down to the bear. Before we realize that, I believe that we can go somewhere, but that's where we're getting it from. We're getting it from that. We're getting it in my in my opinion. I'm no expert at everything, but just from my my observance and and my uh discernment at things, even with me. I had to look in the mirror and own up for my own mess ups and mishaptions.

SPEAKER_00 12:10

No, you can't. Man, we cannot ignore the negative implications of our behavior. Absolutely. Our choices affect others. When we're gone, when we're disabled, we're unable. Who pays the bills for our unmanaged medical issues? Who takes care of us or picks up the slack when we are at the hospital or bedbound? This is more than just the impact that it has on us as individuals and our families, but the long-term impact that if we're not healthy, how are we carrying one for ourselves?

SPEAKER_01 12:43

And it'll go beyond the physical. You know, it'll spiritual. Some would say we're already there. Um, it'll be mental and how we've been treating each other and how it's coming out. You know, even right now, they're twisting up, you know, uh the do unto others as you'd have them do unto you. It's a lot of things that used to be right and now wrong. Um, but yeah, as a collective, I still have hope. And sometimes I don't even know why. Uh maybe because I really do, I have hope even within myself to push through, to be able to help somebody and be helped, you know, by understanding how much even what I'm saying has to be a part of my daily walk. So yeah, I get it. It's it's easy to turn your back on that because we are in the information age. The the day you just these days you push a button, and what used to take even an hour to do now takes a couple of seconds. So sometimes we forget how much the process is the process, and each step is not to be robbed, um, taken away from ourselves at all, because it is meaning something and it is going somewhere, and uh that includes your place in community and your place even on your path.

SPEAKER_00 13:50

And it's key that we find a way into our tribes to talk with men, to share with men, to cry with men, to fail with men, to grow with men, to expand, to evolve, and to be lifted by other men so that we can be the strong men and kings that we've been created to.

SPEAKER_01 14:14

Absolutely, and brother, I'm so excited just again to be here with you, man. And speaking of being there for each other, we we gotta give a shout out to one of the greatest musical minds of our time who has provided some of the greatest soundtracks to our lives, whether we're going through relationship issues, to trying our best not to even harm ourselves, because times are wild. Listen, D'Angelo, we love you, brother. We we mourn your death, but we also celebrate the life that you lived and the beautiful things that you've given us to even keep in mind, again, that active soundtracks to our steps as we walk out these steps to destiny. Brother, rest in heaven, man. We love you, we love you. It's been another one, funky funky but chic.

SPEAKER_03 15:08

Rides up, gonna stay funky, gotta stay chic, gotta stay, and be everything that you know you can be, yeah. Gotta stay funky, gonna stay shit.